There are times when you just have to walk away – from a relationship, a job, a situation, or even a habit – that is no longer working for you. Some things are easier to quit and leave, others are not. You may have no problem leaving a toxic work environment, but quitting that smoking habit, or leaving that stalled relationship with the bad boy/girl seems to take everything you’ve got.

A very helpful way to ritualize and shift the energy around a situation whose end has come, is to cut the cord(s). Ritual alerts the Universe of your intention to make a change. It also speaks to the primal, subconscious part of your psyche where logic isn’t understood, but symbols reign supreme.


In relationships we form etheric cords of attachment. These cords can be loving, healthy connections, or they can be unhealthy, dysfunctional, and/or soul-sucking attachments. Ew! No thank you to the latter.

etheric cords

We form energetic connections to places, habits and patterns, people, how we identify ourselves, and just about any situation that makes us feel good or the complete opposite of good. For instance, you may be attached to the place where you grew up, or you may identify yourself as being of a certain political party. You may be the person who always has a smoke in hand, or you may really love your alma mater. I’m using some pretty innocuous examples here, but there are some very ugly, nasty situations that call for seriously kick-ass mo-jo.

When there comes a time that you realize that the person/place/thing you once loved, doesn’t feel good any more, you know it’s time to move on. You try to change things, but you keep finding yourself right back in the same place, over and over again. This is where you can take more powerful action steps in shifting out of the situation; cord cutting helps by shifting the energy frequency of your intention so that it is more aligned to that of the Universe. You are emitting an energy frequency that attracts a corresponding energy frequency that supports your intention. This is the Law of Attraction, and you are activating it.

I want to give you some concrete ritual ideas for cutting the cord that you can apply to just about any situation, but I’m going to use the example of breaking up with a lover.


First, it helps to know that sometimes cord-cutting must be performed several times – especially if you keep having sex with someone (in the case of a romantic relationship) and, if you keep arguing or otherwise going back-and-forth with someone. Things like continuous texting, stalking their FB timeline, thinking and obsessing about the person etc., are all ways that you keep the energetic cords in tact. (You can insert the other pertinent behaviors here, according to the situation in question, but you get the point.)

I always recommend a 2-pronged approach, calling upon a Divine helper, such as Archangel Michael with his sword, or Kali, Athena, Thor (whomever you pray to), while also simultaneously performing a cord cutting yourself. This approach makes your cord cutting more powerful and gives you the heavy-duty spiritual mo-jo to back you up.

AA michael

Sit in meditation for a while. Ground and center yourself. Breathe deep and call in energy from Above and from the Earth. Ask your Higher Self to show you where the cords of connection are located. You will see, sense or feel the cords’ location.

Pray to whomever you decided to call upon for help, asking to sever the cord(s) of connection, and ask for the cord to be cauterized once cut. Your part is to cut the cord yourself as well as ceasing all the above-mentioned behaviors, and the rest of the things that keep you connected. (You know what they are.)

Set your intention and be very clear that you wish to end the toxic relationship, write it down and/or say it out loud. To cut the cord, choose any of the following methods – use you hand like a knife, your fingers like scissors, or an actual knife or sword (my favorite method) to “cut” the energetic cord – usually found around the solar plexus area. OR, you may choose to use a piece of string or cord and cut it with a sharp instrument of your choosing. If you wrote your intention down, burn the piece of paper to further send your intention out into the ether. 


You may need to continue doing this until all ties are severed, and you no longer feel the attachment energy to the person/thing/ place/ situation. Ask your guides, guardian angels and the Divine to protect you and guide you towards a better life. Again, I must stress the importance of ceasing the behaviors I mentioned above – obsessing only keeps the pattern ingrained. Find something else to do like go for a walk, call a friend, or do something creative when you find yourself slipping back in to these old behaviors.

If you need additional help or guidance, reach out to me and I can work with you on changing what needs to be changed.

*DISCLAIMER – please use caution and be responsible while using sharp tools and while burning things. You should remove all kids and animals from the area you are working in. Any burning should be done in a safe manner, within a fire-safe container.